Not Just Table Setting – A Modern Etiquette Class
In a recent article, I asked, "Is etiquette necessary?”, and provided some examples of how etiquette applies to our daily lives. I mentioned how understanding the rules of etiquette can help us practise good manners and mindfulness in our lives, and allows us to navigate our world with more ease.
Today I would like to dive deeper into this topic and discuss what etiquette is. Simply put, etiquette is a way to communicate respect; respect for ourselves and respect for others as we intentionally create a welcoming space for those around us to inhabit. Etiquette also provides a way to cultivate good manners that help us form positive relationships with people. As we spend our lives interacting with people from different walks of life on a daily basis, displaying respect and good manners will help us deepen the relationships we form, and enjoy pleasant experiences with those we may only see a couple of times in our lifetime.
Just as kindergarten and elementary school help us expand on reading, comprehension, simple mathematics, and the art that we learn at home, etiquette helps us expand on the basics of manners and good behaviour that we first encounter inside the same four walls. When we learn etiquette, we learn how to interact with people who may be strangers to us and are therefore unfamiliar with the norms of our homes. For example, at home, we may express appreciation by giving a sibling a gentle nudge or using a code word from an inside joke created in the past. Etiquette reminds us that the norm in the outside world is to say the word “thank you”, and that making unexpected physical contact with people we do not know well may be considered inappropriate.
Anyone who has watched a tv series or movie, or listened to any hit song in the last six months will know that the world has become more connected. Multiple cultures influence much of the media we consume, the clothes we wear, the food we eat and the conversations we have. But how much do we truly understand the cultures that influence us so much?
Basic manners detect that we take initiative to learn about other cultures and etiquette provides a gateway to do so. This gives us the tools to interact with people from different cultural backgrounds from ours respectfully. In my lifetime, I have lived on three continents with varying cultural norms. Something as simple as what is considered an appropriate form of greeting in one place can be seen as the complete opposite in another. As I have continued to expand on etiquette training personally and for my students, I have found it easier to navigate different cultures, as my understanding of their customs has deepened. This has also led me to build great friendships with people I get to learn many lessons from because of the new perspective they bring into my life.
Although the foundation of etiquette will always be known to be built on table settings, and dining rules, it is an evolving practice that remains relevant in our modern lives. Etiquette helps us create and maintain meaningful connections with the people we meet. It keeps us in touch with the rules of engagement in different social settings we may find ourselves in. And dare I say it… with etiquette we can stand out from the crowd as we move with ease and confidence no matter where we are and who we are with. This summer give etiquette a try and see just how much it will elevate your life!
