Ask Mable: Flowers or Chocolates?

Steve asks,

““Dear Mable,
I hope you still remember me, this is Steve, I attended one of your dining etiquette classes last year; which was so much fun by the way. Thanks again. I’ve been invited to my girlfriend’s parents’ home for dinner, and I am panicking a bit. I remember you sharing some tips with someone who was in a similar situation as I am in now. Do you remember that? I should have paid more attention. Please help!””

Dear Steve:

It’s lovely to hear from you, and yes, I still remember you. That was a fun class for sure, as much as a few forks were dropped.

When invited for dinner, it might be helpful to show up with a small gift to help ease your nerves, and it’s also an appreciated gesture. Here’s what I suggested to the other attendee to take to his in-laws-to-be, which was based on their lifestyle: beautifully wrapped boxed chocolates or a basket of wine and cheese. We also addressed why chocolates were more convenient than fresh cut flowers, which could pose a challenge when your host has to stop what they are doing and start locating a vase. To avoid this inconvenience present flowers in a vase. If your girlfriend has mentioned her parents’ appreciation for potted plants that could be another option for you. All the best. Enjoy your dinner, and please don’t start eating until you have been invited to do so.

This question is from the Ask Mable archives. You can submit your questions here.